I think you may have noticed by now, but I haven’t been really active with Starpura Space or even with the HOLOSTARS/vtubing fandom as of late. Let’s just say, I’m going through a rough time and, I’ll admit, I’ve been mentally exhausted. I don’t know what state I’m in right now, honestly, but this is a period where an introvert myself just wanted to be alone, not seeing or communicating with anyone. Perhaps, it’s loneliness. Or the urge to wanting to seek attention but my introversion prevents me from doing so. I’m in the state when one part of me shouts out “Please, talk to me… notice me…” while the other part also shouts out “I want to be alone… I’m tired right now.”
Lastly, there’s the thing with the vTuber industry. It has nothing to do with the boys, however, there’s so much negativity surrounding our boys that it’s unavoidable. All these news and drama about other vTuber companies, certain vTubers I don’t really watch but still all over the place, it’s as if every single day, there’s always things happening that would give me a migraine. I guess you can say that all of these negativity is taking a toll on me.
Part of the things that I’ve been doing as well was to cancel most of my memberships. I apologize to the boys, but I need to temporarily cancel to do more budget balancing. I haven’t been purchasing any form of merch because of this.1 But I’m doing all I can to purchase a streaming ticket for the HOLOSTARS’ 5th Anniversary Live this coming June. I planned on attending next month’s Off-Kai Expo, which is located some 20-30 miles drive from my hometown. However, with the things happening right now at work, I may have to miss it. It’s quite a shame because Altare and Bettel will be there, and I wanted to meet both of them if I can. Ah well, next time.
The sidebar, where the merch and events are indicated, will still be updated as much as I can. The backend of the site will be currently updated too, of course. And another thing, I really do need to concentrate on my real life stuff, such as rebuilding my portfolio, adding new projects, and even start focusing on my self-paced UX Design program. I love data analytics, but the creative bug bit me since February, and now I need to refresh.
I did spend a lot of time rebuilding my old personal blog/site with a new name, ADRIANNE’S SPACE, and I do plan on consolidating a lot of my old sites that I no longer am active with. I also plan on joining the old indie hobbyist web design scene, just like how I was there some decades ago. Times have changed. I closed down my old J-Pop fan blog since I haven’t blogged there for the last two years, and would write random posts about it on this new personal blog. I’ll be writing about video games there too. The only site that I’ll be keeping open would be this one, as well as my Link in Bio site.
How long am I going to take a break from the vTuber fandom? Until I’m well enough mentally (and hopefully financially, but my mental health is priority), of course. There’s still some other issues that I have to face on my own, as I don’t want to involve anyone, and so, I’ll deal with that as well.
Short entry. This is a Quick News post, after all.
- On the other hand, I don’t have a shrine and I don’t have space to build my shrine. I’m quite picky when it comes to merch – I go for the practical ones, like Altare’s ramen bowl set from his birthday merch two years ago, for example. [↩]
